Meg Eden Kuyatt is the author of the new middle grade novel The Girl in the Walls. Her other books include the middle grade novel Good Different.
Q: What inspired you to write The Girl in the Walls, and how did you create your character V?
A: All my protagonists start out with one of my wounds, or a side of myself I want to explore. While Selah in Good Different is discovering her autism, I wanted V to (at least start) loud and proud about her autism.
With V I wanted to explore how I love being autistic, but people can make me doubt this, or make me wonder if I am only appreciated when I’m a high-masking, well-behaved autistic.
Would I still be loved as sincerely if I struggled more intensely with impulse regulation, or RSD, or externalizing symptoms? Have I always been told I’m a “good kid” in large part because I happen to be someone who internalizes her symptoms? What are the ramifications of this?
I know surely that for those who truly love me, I am loved as I am. But this doesn’t mean doubt can’t creep in, and hurtful interactions can make me doubt myself. And when I struggle, I write about it, because I’m learning alongside my protagonist.
I wanted to see how V found a way through to learn how I might be able to more healthily deal with my feelings and invite room for grace and restoration when possible.
Q: How would you describe the dynamic between V and her grandmother, Jojo?
A: V and Jojo seem like total opposites by all appearances, but people are more complicated than we might initially think. Sometimes, people drive us up the wall because they’re similar to us in ways we don’t expect. Sometimes because we have the same insecurities, but we don’t want to admit seeing that in ourselves. We all think we’re the hero of the story; we all act thinking we’re doing the right thing most of the time.
Q: Did you know how the story would end before you started writing it, or did you make many changes along the way?
A: I generally know the emotional arc of a story pretty early on, but what that’ll actually look like in action is something I don’t know for quite a while.
Q: The author Padma Venkatraman said of the book, “Meg Eden Kuyatt’s latest book is more than an entertaining ghost story with a mysterious twist; it’s also an ode to the importance of openness.” What do you think of that description?
A: I do think it’s about openness, and how dangerous and malignant secrets can be. I think it’s also about the importance of asking questions, listening, and trying to have empathy and grace for one another, even if people do things that don’t always make sense to us.
Q: What are you working on now?
A: I’m so excited to have a Good Different companion novel in the works, and a YA with two autistic leads (that I’ve been working on for over 10 years now, so it’s such a joy to know it’s coming out into the world)!
Being undiagnosed for most of my life, I’m really enjoying exploring what it means to be autistic and how to be a healthy autistic person in a neurotypical, often ableist world. So, we’ll see where that leads me as I play with future ideas!
--Interview with Deborah Kalb
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