Q&A with Tom Adams and Joy Jones

 

Tom Adams

 

 

Tom Adams and Joy Jones are the authors of the new biography A Marriage That Changed the World: Lois and Bill Wilson and the Addiction Recovery Movement. Adams has also written the book The Nonprofit Leadership Transition and Development Guide. Jones's other books include the children's picture book The Sky Is Not Blue.

 

Q: What inspired you to write a biography of Lois and Bill Wilson, and how would you describe their legacy today?

 

Joy: Tom told me he had the idea of writing not just about Bill Wilson but about Bill and his wife, Lois, and how their synergy and support was the basis for the 12 Step Movement. What a fantastic idea! I told him.

 

I only meant to be his cheerleader, but somehow he talked me into collaborating on the actual project.

 

Tom: I have personally benefited from the healing power of several Twelve Step programs. I have grown spiritually and emotionally and am a better husband, father, grandfather, and friend because of active participation in the Twelve Step movement Lois and Bill pioneered.

 

I am appalled by the growing number of people of all ages whose lives are harmed and even destroyed by addictions’ tentacles. I know recovery is possible for many more people.

 

By recounting the story of Lois and Bill Wilson, my aim is to bring helpful information, hope, and the possibility of recovery to more people and to broaden acceptance and action to address our societal denial about our addiction pandemic. 

Joy Jones

Q: The writer Christie Tate said of the book, “Adams and Jones have brought Lois Wilson out of the shadow of her larger-than-life husband and let her words and incredible life works stand next to his.” What do you think of that description, and how would you describe the dynamic between the two of them?

 

Tom: For a number of reasons, the founding story of Alcoholics Anonymous centers on Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob Smith. It was Bill’s meeting with Dr. Bob and their work together in Akron that resulted in the founding of Alcoholics Anonymous.

 

That is indeed a life-changing event. However, it was possible because of the love and support of Lois Wilson and Anne Smith, their respective wives. Lois, Anne and other spouses provided more than love and support. Their ideas shaped the spirituality that became the Twelve Steps.

 

Their awareness that alcoholism was a family disease and they head to personally change by embracing the same Twelve Steps changed the path of addiction recovery forever.

 

Lois and Bill’s marriage is best characterized by the words they embraced: love and service. They were ordinary humans who quite humbly admitted their imperfections and saw themselves as channels or instruments of a Higher Power or God. They loved each other for over 50 years and shared a rich life of service, travel and a constant desire to learn, grow and help others.

 

Q: How did you collaborate on this project? What was your writing process like? 

 

Joy: I regard writing as a solo act. However, obviously when you have a partner, you have to orient yourself in a different way. Since The Marriage That Changed The World was Tom’s baby, I saw myself as a guide on the side while he was the sage on the stage. I tried to stay out of the way and let him tell the story he needed to tell.

 

Tom: Joy encouraged me to write this book. We were part of a writers’ group and every time the idea came up she said what a great idea it was. She reluctantly agreed to be a co-author when I suggested it would be a better book if we worked together on it. (And it is because she said yes!)

 

I took the lead on the research and first drafts. Joy selected particular topics related to Lois and her marriage and researched and wrote on those. We intentionally wanted the book to be a good read with emotion, not a dry biography or history book. Joy is a terrific storyteller and communicator.

 

Q: How did you research the book, and what did you learn that especially surprised you? 

 

Joy: Before I studied Bill and Lois Wilson, I regarded them as paragons of faith and wisdom. Yes, they possessed great faith and much wisdom, but they displayed all the character defects, bad luck, and stupid choices that afflict every one of us.

 

The sad truth is that even if God singles you out to do great things, you still have to stumble, be humble, and suffer before you succeed.

 

Tom: I was amazed at how much incorrect information and impressions there are of both Lois and Bill and how unknown and underappreciated Lois is.

 

It was eye-opening to be working in the archives at Stepping Stones or A.A. General Services office and come across a diary entry from Lois or a letter from or to Lois or Bill, that would add another dimension to better understanding them. It was like putting a jigsaw puzzle together. Each piece helped make the big picture clearer.

 

While we certainly don’t have the whole picture, and more will be learned over time, I do believe we have advanced understanding and appreciation for this complex, amazing couple. 

 

Q: What are you working on now? 

 

Joy: I have a novel for young people, Walking The Boomerang, that I’m hopeful about bringing to shelves soon. It tells the story of a young man who learns that the simple practice of walking can transform your life.

 

Right now, I‘m excited about my picture book about creativity, The Sky Is Not Blue, that’s out now.

 

Tom: Great question. I’ve learned to make space for my Higher Power I call Big Spirit to shape my intuitions. So I imagine talking about this book will shape what I write next. Possibilities include returning to some children's books I worked on, learning more about addictions' impact on families, and writing about the “family disease” and family recovery. 

 

Q: Anything else we should know?

 

Joy: This book is for anyone who enjoys biography or history, who is curious about the backstory to one of the 20th century’s major social movements, or who wants to affirm their personal journey of recovery.

 

Tom: Many years ago, I decided on a personal mission statement for my life - “to expand safe places for people to grow.”

 

Ultimately, we all want to love and be loved. Addictions, childhood experiences, and many other factors influence our belief that we are loved and able to love.

 

This book has been an opportunity for me to learn and grow in my capacity to receive and give love. I hope it offers the same gift to readers whether facing addictions or not. 

 

--Interview with Deborah Kalb. Here's a previous Q&A with Joy Jones. For more information on the authors, see

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