Q&A with Deb Miller

 

 

 

Deb Miller is the author of the new memoir Forget the Fairy Tale and Find Your Happiness. Also a marketing professor, she lives in the Seattle area. 

 

Q: What inspired you to write Forget the Fairy Tale and Find Your Happiness?

 

A: When the pandemic hit, I finally had time to reflect—and write. At first, it was simply a collection of family stories for my kids, a way to preserve our history from my point of view.

 

But soon, a theme emerged: this wasn’t just memory-keeping, it was the story of a woman’s transformation. I realized I had something more universal to say about resilience, reinvention, and what it really means to live happily ever after.

 

Q: The writer Bonnie Comfort said of the book, “Although women have come a long way, they still need to hear the wisdom in Miller’s story: be the CEO of your own life.” What do you think of that description?

 

A: I love that description—Bonnie nailed it. So many of us are taught to wait for a rescue, a romance, or the “perfect” life to bring happiness. But the truth is, you’re the only one who can define and pursue your own version of joy. You’re the CEO of your life—so own the role.

 

Q: What importance do you see fairy tales playing in your own life and in those of other women?

 

A: Fairy tales shape our earliest ideas about what life should look like, especially for girls. As Dr. Jack Zipes, the esteemed fairy tale scholar, said about my memoir: women are often deceived by traditional depictions of their roles.

 

Over time, media like Disney evolved from damsels in distress to warrior princesses, and women like me were evolving right alongside. These narratives matter—they set expectations we have to consciously unlearn in order to live authentically.

 

Q: What impact did it have on you to write this book, and what do you hope readers take away from it?

 

A: Writing this book helped me connect the dots of my life. It was no longer just about documenting milestones—it became a deeper reflection on how I changed and grew, both in how I saw myself and how the world saw me.

 

I hope readers come away feeling empowered to redefine happiness on their own terms.

 

Q: What are you working on now?

 

A: I may have been a vice president of marketing, and I teach the subject to MBA students, but book marketing has been a whole new ballgame for me.

 

Q: Anything else we should know?

 

A: Research by happiness expert Sonja Lyubomirsky shows that while 50 percent of our happiness is genetic and 10 percent is circumstantial, a full 40 percent is within our control. That means we hold more power than we think.

 

Forget the Fairy Tale and Find Your Happiness is my invitation to women everywhere to take control of their happiness. I’ve got some ideas on my website to help you get started… and some playlists for a little extra inspiration!

 

--Interview with Deborah Kalb