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Photo by Star Dewar
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Beth Ann Mathews is the author of the new book Deep Waters: A Memoir of Loss, Alaska Adventure, and Love Rekindled. She taught at the University of Alaska Southeast for 20 years, and she lives on an island in Puget Sound, Washington.
Q:
Why did you decide to write this memoir about your family's experiences
following your husband's stroke, and how long did it take to write the book?
A:
I didn’t set out to write a book, but a blog site called CaringBridge, designed
to help families communicate during a health crisis, catalyzed that journey. I’m
a marine biologist and I’d published scientific papers, but before a simple
household chore triggered a rare type of stroke in my healthy, fit husband, I’d
never shared personal writing beyond our families.
After
being medivacked from Juneau, Alaska, to a medical center in Seattle,
Washington, I needed to notify our families—and my boss and colleagues at the
university where I was expected to show up for work that day—about what had
happened.
Sharing
that first emotional description of that alarming day so broadly at first made
me feel too vulnerable. But I didn’t have time to write a second, less personal
version and so I pressed the SEND button.
Supportive
responses to my writing poured in and shored me up—as much as my husband, Jim.
Finding the CaringBridge website was a communication godsend. Feedback inspired
me to keep writing.
Later,
in critique groups, I discovered classmates were engaged by my stories of how Jim’s
determination to walk, swallow without choking, and ride a bike—bolstered and
strained by our family’s sailing expeditions in Alaska—pushed me to eventually
choose a more adventurous, connected path over a safer, more secure life.
After
I had a full draft, I realized Deep Waters was not simply a stroke recovery
story, but a tale of relationship resilience. Exploring Alaska’s Inside
Passage, sailing and fishing with our son, facing my issues with workaholism, and
navigating threatening situations at sea, are all part of the book. The hurdles
we overcame had the potential to help other couples and families navigate a
health or other relationship crisis.
Writing
Deep Waters took nine years, depending on when I start the clock. I consider
that moment the day I joined my first critique group in La Paz, Mexico.
My
husband, son, and I were living and traveling on our sailboat when a fellow
boater invited me to join the Sea of Cortez Writing Group, hosted by George and
Roz Potvin. Roz had been a reporter for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation
and The Vancouver Sun. George was also a writer, and the couple generously
hosted six or seven writers in their historic home.
During
my first session, insecurities about reading in front of skilled writers built.
Fortunately, I overcame self-doubt and read that day, and every week until we
left to continue our expedition. Seated at the Potvins’ dining room table was when
the idea of writing a book gathered steam, but for years I kept that aspiration
to myself.
Q:
The writer Lynn Schooler said of the book, “Mathews has penned a deeply
personal love story with the careful rigor of the scientist she is, free of any
giddy prose or rainbows. Instead, Deep Waters comes at the reader
with the gloves off and goes a full twelve rounds, documenting in granular
detail the fears and conflicts attending a life-altering event that can drive
even a strong relationship onto the ropes, and the endurance, commitment, and
deep love that can save it.” What do you think of that description, and what
impact did your experience as a scientist have on your writing of this book?
A:
When I received Lynn Schooler’s endorsement of Deep Waters, the power of it
almost knocked me off my chair. He’s an accomplished author of critically
acclaimed books, including The Blue Bear and Walking Home. His words made me
feel as if he had lived that year with us—a profound sensation.
What
he wrote captured so much—that even strong relationships have highs and lows,
and people who love each other don’t always see eye to eye, and that working
through disagreements is hard but if the underlying connections prevail, the
debate can create a new, fulfilling path forward. Schooler’s review might lead
prospective readers to assume that my husband and I had physical clashes which
is not the case, but I think it’s clear he’s using the fighters’ ring as a
metaphor.
Being
a scientist influences my creative writing in many ways. Mostly positive, I
think, but I’ll mention two, one positive and the other a limitation I had to
overcome.
While
doing field research and when I go boating with my family, I keep journals. As
a field biologist, recording unusual events is in my blood. Soon after my
husband’s stroke, the compulsion to document what was happening, as well as my
emotional turmoil, began and those entries provided rich material for my
writing.
But
it’s not simply the words that rekindle memories so vivid they burn. Seeing my
hand writing and sketches, or a spaghetti-sauce stain on a page, can open a
trapdoor to what I was feeling, smelling, and experiencing in that moment. Was
I in awe of a killer whale that zipped in close to our boat, turned on its
side, and stared at me looking back at him? Or, was I heart-pounding
fearful during a night storm when our sailboat home was about to go aground?
As
a scientist, I came to the essay-writing table with a reasonable understanding
of grammar and sentence structure. During a memoir-writing class, after I read
an early chapter, the instructor, Steve Boga, nodded, cleared his throat, and
said, “Well. Now we know you can write,” which was his standard response to
most new students.
He
went on to say, however, that I needed to learn to incorporate more dialogue
into my writing. That recommendation helped me enliven my creative nonfiction
more than any other.
Q:
What impact did it have on you to write the book, and what do your family
members think of it?
A:
Learning how to write a book that strangers might want to read has been
challenging but also fulfilling. I’ve taken classes, read books on writing,
participated in critique groups, attended workshops and conferences, and worked
with gifted editors. Telling the story of how our lives were jolted and
redirected by my husband’s medical situation has given me insights to who I am
and helped me make sense of some of my reactions to our circumstances.
My
husband has been remarkably supportive of my writing a book that shares our
close, vulnerable moments, and moments in which we each, at times, are not at
our best. Even though he has encouraged me, reading certain chapters of Deep
Waters triggers him to re-live that difficult year.
If
he did, however, read those chapters without an emotional response, I would
question the quality of my writing. His support stems from his belief that our
experiences and what we struggled with and learned can inspire readers to live
more full and engaged lives.
Our
son has been a steady champion of my writing endeavors, and he’s provided
helpful feedback on a handful of scenes. Still, while he was young, I did not
ask him to review chapters about harrowing events the three of us experienced.
Now, in his 20s, he’s let me know he’s proud of how I’ve persevered and of my
creativity, and that he’s excited to read my book.
Q:
What do you hope readers take away from your story?
A:
I hope Deep Waters inspires readers to invest more in worthwhile, but
neglected, relationships.
Q:
What are you working on now?
A:
I’ve completed the manuscript for my second book, which I’ve set aside to work
with my publicist to get the word out about Deep Waters. I had my first radio
interview, which was with Suzanne M. Lang on KRCB/NPR’s “A Novel Idea.” My book tour began a week ago
in California and I’m now in Juneau, Alaska, where we lived for 20 years. My
next author events are in Washington, Indiana, and Ohio and I’d love to meet
readers at one of these events https://www.elizabethannmathews.com/news-events.
Q:
Anything else we should know?
A:
To learn more about Deep Waters: A Memoir of Loss, Alaska Adventure, and Love
Rekindled, I invite readers to visit my website elizabethannmathews.com/books
and Facebook author site https://www.facebook.com/BethAnnMathewsAuthor/. To schedule a virtual
Book Club Reading, Q&A, or Discussion of Deep Waters send me an email. info@bethannmathews.com
Thank
you, Deborah!
--Interview with Deborah Kalb